Best.Aunt.Ever.

My ten year old nephew was up for the weekend. Since I missed his birthday party (Hubby took me to The Borgota that weekend. BTW- the bathroom was a religious experience), I took him shopping. He went home with a newly pierced ear, a Green Day t-shirt, InuYasha messenger bag, Gorillaz CD and bleached out hair. I rock.

I felt bad, though- the only place that pierced ears was Claire's. Those not familiar- it's Girlie Girl Heaven. Pink and sparkles as far as the eye can see. Our converstation went something like this:

"Which ear are you going to do?

"I don't know, I have to ask them which one means you're not gay."

"Ian, they're not going to know that. This is a girl's store; they're used to doing both ears."

And a look of panic washed over his face. Thank Goddess my man was close at hand. We had to leave the store and track him down to make sure my nephew wouldn't be ostracized Monday morning.

Since he was a little nervous, I went first and did the cartilage in my right ear. Wouldn't you know it- the damn gun jammed and the bitch had to push the thing the rest of the way through. "HOLY F&#%@!!!!" I screamed on the inside. Naturally, I didn't flinch. He really wanted that earring.

Then we all went bowling. With bumpers for my four year old niece. And I still couldn't break a hundred. Pathetic.

I called my brother to join us, because everyone loves Uncle Jay. He couldn't make it because- get this- he was looking for a new apartment, with his friend, sans DogGirl. WOO-HOO!!!! My ear didn't hurt so much after that bit of good news.