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Thursday, September 30

I May Vomit

Tuesday night, my brother and NonGirlfriend had a 2am session that woke up the entire house (including the upstairs neighbors). Homegirl was screaming- the loudest I've ever heard- like she was turning into a dog instead of just being fucked by one*. Adding insult to injury, Jay's music selection was along the lines of Aesop Rock...

I wake up at 6am to have a 12 hour day- and Jay knows this. Considering I also spent the past two days with a head cold, to awake in the wee hours of the morning pissed me off, to say the least. So much so I yelled through the vent at them, "OKAY, LET'S CALL IT A NIGHT! CHRIST!" (Hey, being whacked out on NyQuil does strange things to a gal). Yeah, that was an exercise in futility.

The next day, I spoke a bit more rationally with my brother, outlining the numerous ways in which he's an excellent roommate. The middle-of-the-night fuckfests had, indeed, been tamer (the first two months were ridiculous). However, last night seemed simply uncalled for and needed to cease entirely (of that magnitude).

Naturally, Jay apologized and made concessions. He also divulged that beforehand, he informed her they needed to be quiet, since our nephew was crashing on the couch.

Suddenly it made sense. That repugnant, loathsome, bestial skank wanted my nephew to hear her (hence the increased volume) at the expense of everyone else in the house.

But the jokes on her. Travis is a heavy sleeper and wasn't affected in the least**.

*I don't understand that. If you're going to go through the trouble of reaching the decibel level of howler monkeys, don't you want to at least sound sexy, for fuck's sake?!

**Besides, I already briefed him so he shuddered when she walked by.

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