Friday, June 17

Last Hurrah

Upon revealing the impending nuptuals to my darling cousin, without hesitation, she informed me that she's throwing the bachelorette party (god love 'er). Which is really more of a Maid of Honor thing... but my Maid of Honor is in school full time and has a three year old, so it's just as well my cousin took the reigns.

After a delightful dinner, she presented me with a couple of options. This place will accomodate us with the VIP table, in which I'll have "The Hot Seat." Heh-heh. Just so long as none of them pull a "Gonzo," I'll be alright.

I'm also trying to convince my honey to have his party in the city that night as well. Is that too much? ...I figured since a few of my West Coast male friends will be in town. And we can all meet up at an after-hours, or for breakfast then catch the first train back to Jersey.

Thursday, June 9


*Every married woman in my office has been telling me about their wedding (complete with photos) since my engagement was literally announced. (I told a co-worker- who developed into a friend- over lunch and when we walked back into the office, she shouted, "MARIETTA'S GETTING MARRIED!!")

*A co-worker (whom I barely know, and is nuttier than a Waldorf Salad) congratulated me with a hug and started to cry. Hard. On my shoulder. For an uncomfortably long time. Until the point where I let go. Then eventually gave her a consoling pat on the back.

*A couple of weeks ago, my brother calls me up, "Uh, I'm sorta engaged." I asked if she's 'half pregnant.' No, just out of her tree. They were in NYC and just happened to be walking by the diamond district and popped into a store. She walked out with a 3k heart-shaped rock. Paid 7Gs for it, appraised for 18.

Meanwhile, this chick just graduated from college, so I ask Jay, "Where'd she get the money for that?!"

-She fucking paid for it. Since then, my brother's new nickname is "Federline."

"Her father's loaded. Some big-shot real estate guy in CA. You know what he got her for a graduation present? He's building her a house in San Diego." So now it's like, hmmmm- he could do worse. My brother doesn't have any goals so this is a good way to become a homeowner.

But the reality of DogGirl is always in the back of my mind. I call 'em Sid & Nancy; they're totally crackers when intoxicated. But, whatev. I'll go to the wedding in Italy.

Tuesday, June 7

Gearing Up

Okay, so aside from last week's vacation (inwhich enough booze was consumed for two lifetimes), I've been super strict with the diet and exercise. The clothing is loosening up a bit but the scale hasn't budged but a handful of pounds. Quite discouraging. (Note to self: chuck that liar out the window). I'm actually considering lyposuction -or lyposculpture as they're calling it these days- since on my most important day, I'll be wearing white. WHITE! I don't even where white in season. Let's just day, unless you're totally toned, it exaggerates your figure. No bueno. But my dress has a corset back, so that's form forgiving.

But my next fitting isn't until August 6th, so I have to remain totally committed. I just don't want to look at the wedding photo proofs and think, "OhMiGawd, I look so fat!" Can ya dig it? I knew that cha could.

Okay, I'm done kvetching.

On a related topic, my cousin tells me the bachelorette party is shaping up to be a crazy blow-out. I wish The Orange Showroom #5 were closer....